unmakings

last night i had some good ideas while i was falling asleep. now that im in a new place and suddenly busy, theres been a few days where i get home exhausted and get right into bed, i lie on my side, and to comfort myself i imagine i'm being spooned. so i was thinking about making plushy forms that people could use to relate to with their bodies, me, audience, dancers, i don't know. but sort of like the ernesto neto humanoid blobs, making these architectural forms that are both hard and soft, that people can discover different ways to relate to propositionally (in, on, below, above, etc.) 
i was imagining a stack of people and these objects in a space, just resting.
talked to elizabeth last week about her non-destination oriented walks she goes on, where she finds places she encounters in real life to respond to, as a manifestation of being present and embodied and impulsive, she is able to relate to her environment in a more immediate way. 
i don't consider myself a performer nor really feel i need to be one, but i liked that during tontlawald i made my installation months before the show opened, and the movers got to rehearse for almost 2 months and generated movements in reaction to my work, instead of me making the work to accommodate their movements. in a way that structure let me be a choreographer , because i set up obstacles that the movers had to work with/around/through.

also need to sort out my desire to make material decisions v. conceptual decisions. like for example if i wanted to make something prepositional to relate to with your body, i could just make a white plushy shape that a body could fit into, like ernesto, but im also so interested in playing with materials, adding wax and different things, especially now that I'm about to have a messy studio... i don't really know how to make decisions for both desires. 

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i feel like i may have had a good idea about how to do both -- i want to make stop motion videos where i document something being destroyed (right now I'm thinking about a shoe that i have that is really great but breaking and i can't wear it anymore).  it will be a situation where i can do something very material as i destroy it, and then i want to experiment with editing to see what i can make it look like is happening. i like the idea of jibbles and bits of leather slowly being pieced together to make a shoe, but filmed up close, maybe not super sure what you are looking at. almost like this thing came into existence by magic. and i could do it with like 3 objects , all of different materials. i like the clean white background. i really need photoshop.